Somebody for me...

I want somebody...

...who can make me a good coffee in the morning...having a good coffee in the morning is not as easy as blending sugar and coffee powder in a mug of hot water...it also has a good conversation with it...that makes life sweeter...

...who can make me walk with my 3 inches hi-heel-shoes...it was a gift from my dad on my last birthday...but since then, i've just been wearing the shoes inside my room only...never that it reached the front door of the house...too scared to fall on the ground...to scared to have a cracked heel...sprains and bruises... i want someone who can will teach me to stand with it all...

...who can make me burst out of laughter...too much of it that i maybe able chuckle and tear out of laughs...but at the end of the night, he will make me sleep on his shoulder like a child...humming lullabyes that will make the world still...

...who can draw his face in my heart...by touching my soul with his smile...

...who will never hide a secret even if it will make me cry out loud...

...who will slightly punch me on my face when i am out of my head...a good wake up call there...

...who will teach me how to be a boy...and is willing to be taught on how to be a girl...we will trade stuffs like no one else does...drive us like a hell but will fix things back...

Goodbye

You know I love you. I feel I've loved you forever. Lately, I haven't been feeling very well. Truth be told, I'm tired. Out somewhere one night, I realized something and I haven't been able to shake it. Since you’ve been away, I've spent almost my entire life with ghosts. We've been like close friends and out of loneliness it occurred to me that it was time for me to bury them. I can't do that here. I'm so sorry. No matter how hard I try to fight it off, I'm left with the feeling that I have to go. I have no idea where I'm going, but I know I have to do this. If I don't, I'm afraid I'll self destruct and worse, you'll be there to see it happen. Be safe. Know that I tried very hard to stay. Know that you were my one and only. I'll miss you with every beat of my heart. Our life together was the only home I've ever had. I wouldn't trade it for anything. I love you. I always will. Goodbye."


: an excerpt of courage to express how i am feeling inside...after watching CSI sarah sidle's goodbye to grissom...It feels like i am sarah then...i know where she's coming...and now..."lost somewhere"