...when you fall and you get nothing out if but pain?
...when you believed and has been carried away by his wonderful promises, beautiful plans and sweet endearments that you thought we're not impossible to be fakes?
...when you loved because you get hooked on his wonderful soul?
...when you give in because...the only reason you have is HIM-he said he loved you...
now i realized it's more wiser to weight all the words than how you feel...because somehow it more explains and sounds the way things should go...perhaps , there's a big difference between "he said he loves you" and "he promised you his love"...so far...
I should have seen it coming...i should have paid much attention on every single detail of doubt i had...guess i was so blinded by your words...that you've almost killed my soul...
Wednesday, March 25, 2009
why?...
It all happened in a flash...i fell so badly...
i thought love will never let me grieve on things that i never thought love could cause me...but there it came "so much of it"...
I fell in love with you because of no any reason to reply...my heart don't have the mouth to speak out of how it feels...rather that it would change my cheek's color for a blush...for a pale of sadness...or for an ached smile...my brain works for my hearts happiness...
Anatomy is not my forte, but that's how magnificently i ended up explaining how i feel right now...right now that we're thru...we're ENDED...
My eyes...it won't stop shedding tears...it almost get a luggage...and worst, i can't see well...
My nose... i thought i can't smell the air...the coffee...shucks i can't breathe...
My lips...well, i don't know how it turned out so red when i don't put a lipstick, oh, now i remember, when i was a kid, i always face the mirror when i'm crying...i realized then, i'm cute when i'm crying...(stupid)
My body...it's shaking, i don;t understand this force that's keeping me shakin' , well, i'm nit doing anything then...or maybe the oxygen that i can't inhale...
My Brain...this is my most precious brain...i graduated in BS Psychology -Academic Scholar and Topnotch level...but now i can't explain, just what and where it went wrong...
My Heart...It never dies...but it's lost somewhere i don't know.... x(
You know who taught me to use this " x( " ? ....it's you...g
i thought love will never let me grieve on things that i never thought love could cause me...but there it came "so much of it"...
I fell in love with you because of no any reason to reply...my heart don't have the mouth to speak out of how it feels...rather that it would change my cheek's color for a blush...for a pale of sadness...or for an ached smile...my brain works for my hearts happiness...
Anatomy is not my forte, but that's how magnificently i ended up explaining how i feel right now...right now that we're thru...we're ENDED...
My eyes...it won't stop shedding tears...it almost get a luggage...and worst, i can't see well...
My nose... i thought i can't smell the air...the coffee...shucks i can't breathe...
My lips...well, i don't know how it turned out so red when i don't put a lipstick, oh, now i remember, when i was a kid, i always face the mirror when i'm crying...i realized then, i'm cute when i'm crying...(stupid)
My body...it's shaking, i don;t understand this force that's keeping me shakin' , well, i'm nit doing anything then...or maybe the oxygen that i can't inhale...
My Brain...this is my most precious brain...i graduated in BS Psychology -Academic Scholar and Topnotch level...but now i can't explain, just what and where it went wrong...
My Heart...It never dies...but it's lost somewhere i don't know.... x(
You know who taught me to use this " x( " ? ....it's you...g
“identify”
i just can’t breathe…
misunderstood by the world that surrounds me…not an easy life to bear…my friend is only anvie, myself and the psychologist’s words stating that , "We are all set to Individual differences…" pretty much applicable to what is merely happening right now…to me.
Musical emotions are wrapping up my personal crisis…some songs says i feel lovely, while some says i’m destructed.
My identity is not written on a piece of paper , rather , laminated, hunged- worn during the entrance to school grounds or company buildings, my identity is when you ask for more of my world…not totally burying your feet on my paths, just walk over…walk over…
A simple blow of your soul is much appreciated by my life… no add-ons…just be you and everything is real…i don’t care who teach you the crime of moving away from me…as long as you can turn your walk back to me….i don’t need any explanation form you, as long as you can fix the torn sheets you have caused me feeling this down damn.
A cup of coffee will do a long run of acquaintance…and then goes my simple introduction of myself…not any talkshit me…i am who i am. The hell i care if you don’t like me, i’m just being me.
Kung di mo masukat ang nararamdaman ko ngayon…tatagalugin ko!
"di naman ako masamang tao, kilalanin mo muna ako bago mo "sabihing lalayo ako sa’yo"….
misunderstood by the world that surrounds me…not an easy life to bear…my friend is only anvie, myself and the psychologist’s words stating that , "We are all set to Individual differences…" pretty much applicable to what is merely happening right now…to me.
Musical emotions are wrapping up my personal crisis…some songs says i feel lovely, while some says i’m destructed.
My identity is not written on a piece of paper , rather , laminated, hunged- worn during the entrance to school grounds or company buildings, my identity is when you ask for more of my world…not totally burying your feet on my paths, just walk over…walk over…
A simple blow of your soul is much appreciated by my life… no add-ons…just be you and everything is real…i don’t care who teach you the crime of moving away from me…as long as you can turn your walk back to me….i don’t need any explanation form you, as long as you can fix the torn sheets you have caused me feeling this down damn.
A cup of coffee will do a long run of acquaintance…and then goes my simple introduction of myself…not any talkshit me…i am who i am. The hell i care if you don’t like me, i’m just being me.
Kung di mo masukat ang nararamdaman ko ngayon…tatagalugin ko!
"di naman ako masamang tao, kilalanin mo muna ako bago mo "sabihing lalayo ako sa’yo"….
At The Jumpstart
"Stay foot right…Keep the soil on felt."
I was’nt able to create this earlier. But i have all of the compositions in my head and heart. As much as possible, i wan’t it all to stay inside my body so that nobody can hurt me, just me , i only find the authority to destruct my substances in nobody but my great self.
To my jumpstart, i need no more introduction, "ayaw ko ng ligoy effect". Today, i declare a start of my emotional calendar, where there are no mondays to sundays’ days’ names , instead, I’m gonna call it " the WHAT I FEEL TODAY’s casting of the entire daily dones…
Now, i got my self a "no important annnakou feeling" . I worked hard for the complete 8 hours not to get bored and suddenly find myself longing for someone,(and i think that’s an established fact that i am of a no importance existence).
Then came another feeling inside me, one which is fighting over the other. It seemed to justify all the bad beliefs and entoxicate those poisons out of my head.Erasing my spoiled belief that i am not devalued, i just walked away then.
One hand is keeping a grasp of his remains, the other waves a farewell. Both of it, quite reasonable on where they hold on to and why they keep ignoring the other side of them.
Why i continuously smell his path when all that is left is his pictures in my thoughts? Why still, i kept calling his name when he never wanted to hear my sound anymore. Why do i have to learn im turned down when i still contrast on it. I’m such a sadistic human, i get the worth by pain. I am slowly dying of it but i keep on living on this hell. I know i’ve got nothing to keep but i still open my wrapped persona to other people whom i undoubtfully offer my life like he was God.
Dear you, i have nothing to give you back from all forms of kindness you are sharing me. All i have is my soul and faithfully i am always here for you. I don’t know why, but i keep on standing here in front of you, though in your eyes, i’m such a ghostly form. I want you to know i’m alive. I’m not a friend and not your enemy as well. I don’t please anybody but you…can you tell why is it all wierdly happening to my life. I want to run away, but even in the fastest escape i make, it always leads me back to your world. Even if i keep my lies on my strongest alibis, i am always revealedin your white and clear sight. My favorite color is GREEN but you turned me liking BLACK and BLUE. Dear you, my world is completely UPSIDE DOWN.
Whenever his eyes deliver a glance, i always hope it is meant for me. Whenever he planned out something wonderful, happy and romantic, i hope he makes me a part of it. Whenever he would run away from all of his worries, nightmares and sorrows, i hope i could bleed on all of it for him, i’d rather get hurt instead of him to feel all disgraces. He’s been to so much of tragic steps and walks, but i wish he could let me step or walk on those, beside him. But on what he tought me from it all- PAIN MAKES THE WORLD GO ROUND AND HARD.
I was’nt able to create this earlier. But i have all of the compositions in my head and heart. As much as possible, i wan’t it all to stay inside my body so that nobody can hurt me, just me , i only find the authority to destruct my substances in nobody but my great self.
To my jumpstart, i need no more introduction, "ayaw ko ng ligoy effect". Today, i declare a start of my emotional calendar, where there are no mondays to sundays’ days’ names , instead, I’m gonna call it " the WHAT I FEEL TODAY’s casting of the entire daily dones…
Now, i got my self a "no important annnakou feeling" . I worked hard for the complete 8 hours not to get bored and suddenly find myself longing for someone,(and i think that’s an established fact that i am of a no importance existence).
Then came another feeling inside me, one which is fighting over the other. It seemed to justify all the bad beliefs and entoxicate those poisons out of my head.Erasing my spoiled belief that i am not devalued, i just walked away then.
One hand is keeping a grasp of his remains, the other waves a farewell. Both of it, quite reasonable on where they hold on to and why they keep ignoring the other side of them.
Why i continuously smell his path when all that is left is his pictures in my thoughts? Why still, i kept calling his name when he never wanted to hear my sound anymore. Why do i have to learn im turned down when i still contrast on it. I’m such a sadistic human, i get the worth by pain. I am slowly dying of it but i keep on living on this hell. I know i’ve got nothing to keep but i still open my wrapped persona to other people whom i undoubtfully offer my life like he was God.
Dear you, i have nothing to give you back from all forms of kindness you are sharing me. All i have is my soul and faithfully i am always here for you. I don’t know why, but i keep on standing here in front of you, though in your eyes, i’m such a ghostly form. I want you to know i’m alive. I’m not a friend and not your enemy as well. I don’t please anybody but you…can you tell why is it all wierdly happening to my life. I want to run away, but even in the fastest escape i make, it always leads me back to your world. Even if i keep my lies on my strongest alibis, i am always revealedin your white and clear sight. My favorite color is GREEN but you turned me liking BLACK and BLUE. Dear you, my world is completely UPSIDE DOWN.
Whenever his eyes deliver a glance, i always hope it is meant for me. Whenever he planned out something wonderful, happy and romantic, i hope he makes me a part of it. Whenever he would run away from all of his worries, nightmares and sorrows, i hope i could bleed on all of it for him, i’d rather get hurt instead of him to feel all disgraces. He’s been to so much of tragic steps and walks, but i wish he could let me step or walk on those, beside him. But on what he tought me from it all- PAIN MAKES THE WORLD GO ROUND AND HARD.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)